The recommended daily calorie intake for a woman is around 2,000, but staring at a a 24-layer piece of chocolate cake that weighs 1kg, something tells me this is more like a week's worth of meals.
It's Friday though and calories don't count as you near the end of the working week. At least that's what I tell myself as I patiently wait my turn in the queue to try the sweet treat I've been dreaming over for years now.
Get Baked, the viral Leeds bakery that gained widespread attention and acclaim for its 'Bruce' chocolate cake which it launched in 2021, has finally landed in Manchester.
Its shiny new Northern Quarter site on Stevenson Square opened as part of a soft launch ahead of a cake giveaway tomorrow (Saturday 15), but we got a sneak peek inside, and access to all the baked goods.
Though it also serves up an array of cookies, pies, soft serve and brownies, it is the chocolate cake that people come for. In fact, some have travelled hundreds of miles to Get Baked's Headingly site just to bag their slice.
Their viral Bruce cake - which owner Rich Mayers has previously said is not a reference to Matilda's Bruce Bogtrotter - was retired last August to the dismay of customers.
But no sooner has the last slice sold out that the bakery's owners has ushered in a new era with 'Bertha'. With the trademark - and a decent online following - under Get Baked's belt she was released into the wild complete with a few tweaks.
Bruce's successor, to be honest with you, looks very similar. However, this glossy tower of goodness with twelve layers of sponge and 12 layers of ganache, now features a sweeter ganache filling made with a mix of milk and dark chocolate.
This hefty, beautiful beast of cake is quite the sight. She glistens in the midday sun, while next to me, influencers and bloggers hold her up for the money shot.
But before we dig in, you should know that she's not cheap, in fact she's £20 a slice. Now before you slam the laptop shut, hear me out.
Bertha used to be a little cheaper, £17 to be precise, but as we all know, ingredients keep getting more expensive.
Anticipating the backlash to the price increase, Rich even took to Instagram to explain that there have been a number of reasons for the increase, with it mostly revolving around the cost of raw materials needed to make each cake.
Posting on social media a few weeks ago, he explained: “You’ve probably heard all about the rising cost of chocolate, but just in case you haven’t, over the last 12 months, the price has gone through the ******* roof.
“We’re now paying over three times the price that we were paying a year ago - we use tonnes of it a month, so you’re talking hundreds of thousands of £ per year more in raw materials.”
Alongside using single-origin Columbian chocolate - which he says is the ‘finest quality available’ - the baker also ensures it only uses cacao from ethical farmers.
“It’s not just the cost of chocolate that’s at an all time high - every other ingredient and cost to the business has sky-rocketed,” he added. “This is not a tale of “woe is me” - GB is a very busy, profitable business, and I’m extremely lucky that we’re doing well in a world that is largely ****ed.
“I do however have to be responsible when it comes to sustainability, and businesses like mine are only viable when you’re prepared to charge the customer enough money. I am prepared to charge the customer enough money.”
It's bold, and to be honest, I don't think it will put people off. You Pays your money and you takes your choice.
Also, unless you have an exceptional appetite, have just completed a ultramarathon or have been on a week-long fast, I'm telling you now, you cannot eat the one slice by yourself - or even in one go.
It's intended for four to five people. And if you can finish it off on your own in one sitting, I'm not impressed, I'm concerned.
Anyway, back to the cake at hand.
Prized out of the box and carefully unwrapped, I realise really is no good way to tuck in so I randomly poke the fork at the centre, finally securing a piece that quickly lands in my mouth.
It is rich, very very rich. But's it's also decadent, luxurious, and to be fair, worth the hype.
I manage a few bites, impressed by the silky ganache and the surprisingly light sponge. I do feel a little sick though and conscious that I'm being watched, so I pack her back up and resolve to eat the slice somewhere a little more private.
Back home, the kettle is popped on, a brew made and a another slither is cut off. Popped in the microwave for about 20 seconds, I think I've cracked it.
The ganache pours from the cake as I grab it out the microwave, but it's gloriously glossy and thankfully doesn't split. If this is just one of the many cakes, bakes and treats they serve at Get Baked, then I'm fairly sure we have unfinished business.
Get Baked is now open at 1 Stevenson Square, Manchester, M1 1DN. It will officially open at 12pm on Saturday, March 15 and the first 1,000 customers will get a free slice of Bertha cake.
